Is it the heat and the humidity that makes mothers and kids wear a tiring look on their face, profusely sweat or is it the ongoing exam season? Summer has come back to haunt Chennai and so is the exam season. Well atleast this month it is more of the latter than the former.
Mothers sacrificing the day time and prime time soaps, students wearing a tense look on their face and even before the exam season could end I could hear people debating what summer courses can they put their kids into? Over ambitious parents pushing their kids into summer coaching classes, language classes, personality development workshops, the list goes on. Schools competing to produce the maximum toppers and state rankers, teachers have their fair share in cramming the little brains and inducing the psychological fear of exams. Today schools start sessions early for kids graduating their 9th and 11th classes and keeping them busy through out the summer vacation. Poor youngsters have lost their wonderful childhood to after school tuitions, special classes to live their parents IIT and medical college dreams.
My colleague at work waits for the clock to strike 3.00 on school days and she would call her home to make sure her son is there and then she would go over the days happening at school frequented by some threatening phrases and some commanding words. She would instruct what he must be doing till she reaches home at half past 6 giving no time to play with the neighborhood kids.
What a contrast to how things where when I grew up. My mother was a house wife and she was around when I came back from school and I could tell talk to her about my day. I had a lot of playtime and there was still a lot of competition, but still I didn’t have that kind of pressure from my folks at home. I was never pushed to top the class, they asked me to do things that brought happiness to me and there was no peer pressure for me to join any of those IIT classes. Those were the days when video games were only for the rich and we had to get out and play and we learnt all about team work, dynamics, and leadership qualities. Computers and video games are they only companions for kids today and they miss out on real time learning opportunities. Juvenile diabetes, hypertension, and other obesity related health problems have already percolated to our kids due to sedentary lifestyle and lack of physical activity. Though elders pass them through their gene, but still we are responsible for giving them a sedentary lifestyle.
With the ongoing exam season the little brains are crammed with fear and anxiety. My colleague would call her son at 30 minutes past ten in the morning to discuss the questions appeared on the exam paper and later in the evening the couple would go over the question paper and to access how much will the kid score. Constant comparison with other friends and bickering that happens at home creates low self esteem in the young minds. The fear of tomorrow’s exam and today’s mishap is definite to take away the peace and confidence.
Peer pressure is pushing parents and kids up the wall and I can see a lot of kids hyperventilating. Students writing their Senior School examination undergo a very stressful phase in their lives since this seem to decide their career and future. Some even go to the extent of committing suicide when they don’t fair upto the expectations of their parents and teachers. Post result season we will read in newspapers about suicides and parental abuse, and organization like SNEHA taking out half page ads in the news papers urging students with low morale and suicidal tendencies to call them.
Education rather than helping a person develop and shape up holistically has become way to make money in life. Parents and teachers will have to understand that education is not the only factor that determines the failure or success of a person. There are so many other skills required for survival and being successful, while education can only give the initial edge. Not all people who’ve graduated from Ivy leagues are always happy and successful in life. Parents today want to push their kid into fields where they can make money and in the process kids seldom get to do and live their passion. Sharat Kumar, a native of Chennai who belongs to the economically weaker sections of the society made it to IIMA and recently graduated with flying. Sharat’s mother sells idlis and snacks to make a living and his father passed away long back and hence Sharat had very little guidance at home and it was his passion that made it work hard and get into IIM.
Every parent wants to wear the badges of honor of their kids getting into IIT, Medical school, and IIM, well it is nice if children are let to chose their profession rather than do things forcefully. When the child is asked what he or she wants to be and the moment they say doctor or an engineer there is a million dollar smile on the parents face. Every parent wants their child to be more successful in life and almost everyone success refers to money, luxury cars, bigger homes, fancy titles and bloated egos. While one or more of the above was just a dream for the parents and they forcefully want to live their dreams through their children. In reality only a few parents let their kids blossom naturally, nurture them without any. It is the fierce passion that stokes the fire in a child and makes them live their dream rather than pressure and fear. When we get to do things naturally and with passion, honor, fame, money and other material success follows.
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