Our extended family planned to gather at Cochin to attend a function last weekend. Given that we are a family of 15 cousins, every meeting does feel like a congregation and calling it a mini Kumbh Mela is no exaggeration.
As soon as this event was decided, a Whatsapp group was promptly formed to motivate people to make their travel plans. As I’m Whatsappphobic and I wasn’t privy to the conversations and banters exchanged in the group, nevertheless, I confirmed my intent to join over a phone call.
The last time we all got together was 3 years ago at Chennai for the youngest cousin’s wedding. And since then we’ve had two new additions to the family tree. It was evident the tree wasn’t growing as fast it used to during the earlier generation. While my dad and his 5 siblings gave birth to 16 of us, these 16 managed to produce only 10 children. Should we attribute the reproductive slowdown as mark of economic prosperity and the theory of quality over quantity?
I reached the venue ahead of the rest and I sat down with her to do a head count and was suprised many of those who confirmed had pulled out due to ill health. When I asked them for the reasons, two of my cousins said viral fever and one other declined as he was the primary caretaker of an ailing parent. Yes, they all had pressing demands to excuse themselves. Nevertheless, 6 out of 16 made it to the gathering.
The conversation took a sudden turn when of my cousins husband remarked about my look. He asked me if I went on a crash diet or was it a combination of exercise and diet that kept me fit. Finally, he concluded that I’ve managed to age gracefully with a spiritual look. Honestly, I don't know what that meant and never bothered to prod further.
After a nice breakfast, I sat next to my aunt and started a conversation with her. She was the only one among her siblings who could make it to the event, while all others suffered from age-related medical issues and stayed away.
Soon after she narrated her recent health set back, my cousin shared about what could she possibly face down the years if she doesn’t control her blood sugar. While he was worried about his mother’s health, he wasn't caring for his. Short while after, he confessed about his blood pressure inching up and being on the borderline and also, shared about health issues of a few other cousins leaving me concerned.
To see many of my cousins (age ranging from early 30s , 40s to 50s) stricken by diseases of the mind and body and carelessly abusing tobacco and alcohol made me worry about their precarious lifestyle. Among them I was the only single man and I had taken better care of my health.
In the pursuit of economic independence and mobility, did my generation ignore their health? The quality over quantity theory that I had proposed in the offspring production was now out of the window.
Despite watching their parents (in their late 60s) develop health issues and playing the role of a care giver hadn’t put an element fear or caution in them. Isn’t it true that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree?
20 years ago, I lost my eldest aunt to cancer, but then I was too young to realize what it means to lose a dear one. With life giving me an opportunity to experience fear, suffering and loss, I know what it is to lose a dear one.
Recently, I was rattled upon watching my aunt whom I’m very attached. She is bravely fighting her losing battle with carcinoma. And today, when I heard my cousin, a sense of worry and helplessness engulfed me. How can I get my cousins who I grew up with start paying attention to their health before it is too late?
Like Arjuna who expressed his anxiety and helplessness over the well-being of his cousins to Krishna, I ramble about my cousins who continue ignored their health. In this battle of life, should I take it as their karma and destiny or give it any try and blow the conch of caution?
My grandma often said having a large family is like a Banyan tree. It’s branches offer cover to those under sweltering sun and fruits to hungry birds. But to see the branches suffer or wither is no fun for either the tree, bird or passerby.
As soon as this event was decided, a Whatsapp group was promptly formed to motivate people to make their travel plans. As I’m Whatsappphobic and I wasn’t privy to the conversations and banters exchanged in the group, nevertheless, I confirmed my intent to join over a phone call.
The last time we all got together was 3 years ago at Chennai for the youngest cousin’s wedding. And since then we’ve had two new additions to the family tree. It was evident the tree wasn’t growing as fast it used to during the earlier generation. While my dad and his 5 siblings gave birth to 16 of us, these 16 managed to produce only 10 children. Should we attribute the reproductive slowdown as mark of economic prosperity and the theory of quality over quantity?
I reached the venue ahead of the rest and I sat down with her to do a head count and was suprised many of those who confirmed had pulled out due to ill health. When I asked them for the reasons, two of my cousins said viral fever and one other declined as he was the primary caretaker of an ailing parent. Yes, they all had pressing demands to excuse themselves. Nevertheless, 6 out of 16 made it to the gathering.
The conversation took a sudden turn when of my cousins husband remarked about my look. He asked me if I went on a crash diet or was it a combination of exercise and diet that kept me fit. Finally, he concluded that I’ve managed to age gracefully with a spiritual look. Honestly, I don't know what that meant and never bothered to prod further.
After a nice breakfast, I sat next to my aunt and started a conversation with her. She was the only one among her siblings who could make it to the event, while all others suffered from age-related medical issues and stayed away.
Soon after she narrated her recent health set back, my cousin shared about what could she possibly face down the years if she doesn’t control her blood sugar. While he was worried about his mother’s health, he wasn't caring for his. Short while after, he confessed about his blood pressure inching up and being on the borderline and also, shared about health issues of a few other cousins leaving me concerned.
To see many of my cousins (age ranging from early 30s , 40s to 50s) stricken by diseases of the mind and body and carelessly abusing tobacco and alcohol made me worry about their precarious lifestyle. Among them I was the only single man and I had taken better care of my health.
In the pursuit of economic independence and mobility, did my generation ignore their health? The quality over quantity theory that I had proposed in the offspring production was now out of the window.
Despite watching their parents (in their late 60s) develop health issues and playing the role of a care giver hadn’t put an element fear or caution in them. Isn’t it true that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree?
20 years ago, I lost my eldest aunt to cancer, but then I was too young to realize what it means to lose a dear one. With life giving me an opportunity to experience fear, suffering and loss, I know what it is to lose a dear one.
Recently, I was rattled upon watching my aunt whom I’m very attached. She is bravely fighting her losing battle with carcinoma. And today, when I heard my cousin, a sense of worry and helplessness engulfed me. How can I get my cousins who I grew up with start paying attention to their health before it is too late?
Like Arjuna who expressed his anxiety and helplessness over the well-being of his cousins to Krishna, I ramble about my cousins who continue ignored their health. In this battle of life, should I take it as their karma and destiny or give it any try and blow the conch of caution?
My grandma often said having a large family is like a Banyan tree. It’s branches offer cover to those under sweltering sun and fruits to hungry birds. But to see the branches suffer or wither is no fun for either the tree, bird or passerby.
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