I always have the habit of doing my homework before I watch a movie, for a few reasons. One, to understand the plot and the characters, two, to make a decision if it is worthwhile to watch and lastly, will I be ready to manage the emotions post the movie? And when I saw 'Amy' posters all over the town, I recognized that it was Amy Winehouse and there was something honest, original and mysterious in her appearance complemented by her distinct mascara and hairdo. But if I were to be quizzed on her life or music, I would be qualify to be an illiterate. I confess, I'm neither a tabloid reader nor a listener of western music, but I wanted to learn about this beautiful singer.
Since this is a documentary, I refrained from reading up any material on Amy so that I could enjoy the screen time without having to compare it with facts that I read from elsewhere. I sat unprepared and was open to understand Amy and evaluate my own life and get inspired watching the movie. Isn't it what biographies and documentaries are meant to do?
Amy comes across as a happy child and with a strong will that even her mother couldn't bend. As you get ready to search for her father in the documentary, you realize that the man is mostly absent, proclaiming to be busy working for the family. Soon a broken marriage at home leaves Amy scarred for life.
Growing up watching broken marriages and failed relationships makes one look for coping mechanisms in life and Amy's life turns out to be another one in that pack. In Amy's case her eating disorder, trouble with drugs and alcohol and her behavior towards men all had a strong bearing from her father's absence during her childhood. Do you realize that our family can be the starting point for our journey along the downward spiral?
Amy begins her teenage years battling depression and that quickly leads way to Bulimia. To cope up with over her disappointments, she slowly begins to write and her innate talent and gifted voice turns her into a nightingale. Her first song https://youtu.be/7CYE0DYIbaw describing her pain from her first relationship with a man 7years older to her wins her award and acclaim.
Is taste of sorrow in youth more dangerous than taste of success? Before we know Amy meets Blake, who also shares a scarred childhood, courtesy his step-mother. The proverb, misery loves company becomes true in their case. And soon Blake turns into another addiction to her coping mechanism. And this time Amy's addiction got depicted on her body as tattoos bearing the name of Blake. Sadly, she tries every trick, but nothing prevents Amy from hitting her lows and get off the emotional roller-coaster.
Her strong will and her mother's meekness gives Amy the opportunity to go unchecked. Her eating disorder morphs into substance abuse (alcohol and cigarettes) and her hidden sorrow becomes the fountainhead of her talent that soon gets her performance and recording opportunities.
From eating disorders, depression, substance abuse, to promiscuity, we use many ways to unction our wounds and cover up the ugly scars beneath. By this point into the documentary many in the audience were already beginning to evaluate their lives looking for similar patterns and scars. By then Blake had introduced crack into Amy's life, apart from giving her the much needed support and self-esteem to shine. Can relationships be a potent performance enhancing drug?
Singing and describing her pain in her own magical voice made Amy popular and soon the filthy British Press starts smells her lows and starts to hound her everywhere she goes. She is on talk shows promoting her albums, that not only celebrate her success, but also berate her failures. For the first time, Blake is out of her life (returns to his ex-girl friend). Like every other disappointment that she been through, she courageously picks herself up to compose the next album Back to Black that eventually earns her 6 coveted Grammys. She rises from ashes like a Phoenix bird. Here is a song from Back to Black: http://youtu.be/TJAfLE39ZZ8
Amy's songs were written by her and the lyrics capture her pain and emotions, which turns out to her autobiography. She and Blake are briefly back together and this time they are forced to go into a rehab, which doesn't help them mend their ways. Was Blake fueling her addiction or was the Amy searching for sadness in her relationship to pen down her next album?
Finally, her father realizes the path Amy has gone down and takes control of her, but it is too late. She stays sober for a few months and begins to start working on her next album "Rehab" featuring all her pain and sorrows. By then Amy is officially divorced from Blake. Here is a song from the album: http://youtu.be/KUmZp8pR1uc
Soon after the album, she goes through another ride on her emotional yo-yo. She cancels her tours and on her last performance in Belgrade http://youtu.be/x4j95dHfB04 she couldn't get herself to sing. The nightingale choked and lost the will to sing; may be there was nothing more left inside her to be expressed. Finally in July 2011, another cocktail of alcohol and drugs stopps her heart and plunges the world of music and her fans into a deep sorrow.
Though she left behind her songs and lyrics (strong-willed) to narrate her story, but nevertheless, the documentary is compelling and brilliantly captures her life from available footages and her own lyrics and voice-overs. She is a star, both real and original. Her music reminds us of our secrets and sorrows.
Amy was lucky to have a circle of friends who understood her, stood by her and who also brought out the real story of her life to the world that ruthlessly measured, misjudged and made her look like a misnomer. How about you?
I came out of the movie hall, a little shaken, and was ready to do some homework by not just on Amy and her songs, but also looking into my life. Isn't it an opportune moment for all of us to do an honest self-enquiry to find out the epicenter of such demons within us and get them destroyed before it destroys you. Finally, before you go away to your rehab listen to this: http://youtu.be/b-I2s5zRbHg
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