Wisdom after 7 years?

I should have started this blog many years ago to stay in touch with you, but sometimes the bulb goes off really late. Nevertheless, it helps me to keep in touch with my friends, family and share my day to day life. There is dash of spiritualism, philosophy, reality and emotions in each of the post.

Every day is so different, there is so much we learn, and we come across. I was in the toilet and reminiscenting my professional life so far. Lol! Not the best place, but still you can prevent you mind from thinking, but still the brightest of ideas and greatest of thoughts starts on tissue paper, lol! Working for a sycophant boss, a stickler, a lose end boss and then came the micro manager, I had them all in my life. It was difficult and tough to adjust to individual leadership styles. When I changed jobs I left the work place creating a trashy image of the job and the manager and sailed on cloud 9 hoping the new place would be heaven. But soon the honeymoon turned into a nightmare and the new boss was worse than the old one. We all have likes and frustrations from the micro managing boss, snoopy colleague, sloppy, slimy subordinate. Nothing is worth losing your happiness and peace of mind and if it is stressful you must consider other opportunities outside. People around us cannot be changed but isn’t it easy to change the way we think and we feel.

Having gone through 7 years of work life and 3 jobs I feel it is not worth getting upset over 0% raises, micro managing boss or a slimy colleague. Every day is different and let us not take things to heart and fail to live a happy life. As we climb the corporate ladder, we sell our time, health, peace of mind, sanity and buy series of ailments. Is money worth more than a contented happy and peaceful life? We all need money to buy some happiness, but let us not try to strike a balance. I find a lot of them stressed out from stretch targets to under performing quarters, family life and sleepless nights and of course from undisciplined subordinates like me posting such blogs during work time. Lol!

I consider work as a 9-6 hobby and to help me pay bills and have a decent life. I try to do other things that are closer to my heart and that keep me happy and charged. In the end when you get appraised, it is God who sits across from you and not your boss from work. God rates you for your good heart, Samaritan attitude and not for the title and salary that you earn. You are rated for your soul and not your title. Title is for the ego and salary is for the wallet. Let us identify things that will make us live a complete life. We get only 1 chance to live, let us make the most out of it and not let people around us spoil the party. Let us sell only our time and not happiness.

God has made each of us in a special way, and no 2 person is alike. Let us learn to live happy without succumbing to pressures from peer, society, and family. Let us learn to appreciate the diversity with in us and around us. In the end, nothing else matter, except happiness. We all can gift us with abundant happiness and peace of mind, it is within and not outside.

I heard a knock on the door and I realized I had been there for 20 minutes, there was another person waiting to take the dream seat. Well I will have to get back to reality now, let me work now. Eureka….Eureka….Eureka..

Bye.. and come back for more.

Weekend Madurai Trip

Chennai presently enjoys good showers after sunset and temperatures have considerably come down. We had tremors on sunday night around 9.15 pm. People were scared and got out of their houses hoping it was not another Tsunami. There were hoards of people waiting on the seashore in Besantnagar to watch the sea swell and awaiting the next Tsunami. We'll we are learning to live with the surprises of nature and take it in the best way.

I had a busy weekend with my sister and brother-in-law. I had been to Madurai to visit temples in the surrounding neighborhood. My nephew and neice (under 10 years) have mastered the art of photography. They both were more than camera savvy, kids are adopting technology very early in their life.

I visited Narasingam, Azhagar Kovil, Thirumogur on Saturday and in the afternoon we left for Thiruthangal and Srivilliputtur. We gate crashed at Shencottah near Courtallam that night and left the following morning to Madurai. We covered Thiruparamkundram, Meenakshi amman temple and Koodal Perumal temple in the evening. With the blessing of Perumal I have covered 90/108 divya desams and hope to cover the rest by the end of the year.

I have posted some of the pictures from the trip and feel free to look at them (Madurai Trip)http://photos.yahoo.com/arun_ri

Let us enjoy the week looking forward for the weekend.

Guru Pournima (Full Moon Day)

Well it has been over a week since my last blog. Work has been busy and I've been trying to keep my head above the water. Sometimes the it is calm before the storm and most of the times it is calm after the storm. lol!

Even business newspaper that report materialistic news have a column on spirituality. Wow! Doesn't that suprise you? Well at the end of the day or at the beginning of the day everybody wants a little ounce of reality check. Today's column started with the famous words of the Hindu saint Adi Shankara "Bhaja Govindam, Bhaja Govindam Muda Mathey" and highlighting the essence of the poem was an article on Para vidya and Apara vidya. Para vidya referes to spiritual education and Apara vidya education refers to the education that helps you chase worldly pursuits. Ovvayar said " Arul illarkku avvulagam illai, porul illarku ivvulugam illai"

From Adi Shankara to Aristotle to Ovvayarr (famous tamil poet) have all said that and have lived by it. We all need money to live in this world and we all need spirituality to live in the other world. Somethings don't change in life, we may get more mechanized but still human heart feels, and mind earns for peace at the end of the day.

While somethings at our cafeteria have changed. They've stopped making the fruit concoction and have stopped playing the 70's music over the FM radio. They have placed a new 29" TV in the cafeteria. We are sourrounded my monitors of all kind during the day at work and in the evening at home. Will we ever get bored of watching these monitors andlet our precious brains mutate?

Some other things have not changed around my city. I had written a blog on silk sarees couple of days back. Nalli the traditional silk merchant resorted to arrogant marketing with their latest bill board all over the town. Their competitor RMKV has innovated, they have made a silk saree with 56,400 different colors. It took 2 resources, 3 months and 50K to get this job done. They have bill boards and ad's in newspapers touting this acchievement. Last year they made the longest silk saree and found a place in the Guinness Book and this year they have another place for the palette of colors. Innovation and creativity scores more and goes a long way than arrogant marketing.

Let me come to the title, today is guru pournima day. Full moon falling on a thursday is very auspicious to start new ventures. For those of you starting new ventures, good luck! Astrologically Moon indicates a person mind, scriptures say "Chandra ma manso jatha: " Moon also indicates mother, mother land, ocean, fine arts. May our hearts and mind fill to the brim like the full moon in the sky.

Western life with an eastern soul

It was a week day afternoon and I just walked out of CNBC office in Venus colony Alwarpet and a gentleman in his early 30’s approached me and asked me if I carried a match box. I didn’t intend to start a conversation with him, but I was waiting for the cab driver to come back. This gentleman was kind of disturbed and desperately looking out for someone with a lighter or a match box. He pacing on the sidewalk and I smiled at him. He stopped besides me and started a conversation. He is an Indian settled in US and had come down for a vacation to Chennai. He took me to his car parked a few yards away and introduced me to his wife. I asked him about the trip and how long has it been since their previous visit to Chennai. In the meantime my cab driver has arrived, but the conversation was getting really interesting. They were asking me if I were married and his wife said she had someone in mind wanted me to hook up with her distant cousin. Well dates and marriages are made in streets too.

The conversation soon took us to the fiery topic in US today. We discussed how outsourcing has brought back a lot of jobs to India, temporarily slowed the brain drain, helping the organic economic growth and finally improving the infrastructure and quality of life. Unlike the usual breed of desi who come home and bash the government and the country, this guy appreciated and enjoyed the change around. He soon opened up more and discussed his life there in US. He had been in US for 15 years now and was definitely a green card holder.

Like most of the NRI, he was quite guilty about the same thing, not being besides his folks in India. He then quickly started tracing his 15 year period in US. Confessions were profound and plain. He said he went through an identity crisis losing his values, Indian origin and getting caught in the usual whirlwind of late night parties, all American friends, weekend barbeque parties, pizza and beer. He said his priorities in life have got shuffled and he is looking for an opportunity to come back home for good and that he can see an exit on the US highway. He was very apologetic living a western life with an eastern soul. He spotted someone with a match box and I could the relief on his face and he looked settled. At the end he said he is missing something in life but said he has not be able to put his fingers on the missing piece and fix it. Let us hope and pray he finds the missing piece.

The journey goes on….

Chennai the truly bill board city

Pooris without oil
December without kutcherys’
Discounts at Nalli

Somethings are unheard
125 years of Nalli

Bill boards on a red back ground without any graffiti and cartoons exhibits the above text in very major traffic light.

It is Aadi masam and all the newly wed brides go back to their parent’s home. There is a scientific reason to why husband and wife live separately for a month. If the wife conceives in July, the baby will be due in May. April, May and June happens the hottest season in India. Those days we did not have air conditioners it was uncomfortable both for the mother and new born child to adjust to the heat. Sounds interesting, huh? It is a very practical solution those days to separate the newly wed couples when contraception was not available.

Traders commercialize every festival and give it a marketing spin. It is a dull season between Tamil New year in April and Diwali in October, and retailers have a tough time. They have exploited this opportunity very well to make some bucks. Every retailer is out with their 30 seconds jingles on TV channels and radios for the Aadi season. Nalli, the traditional silk saree store in the town has launched its latest round of ad. campaigns. Want to hear it?

ISO....

I was near Chetpet traffic light couple of days ago and I remembered a friend of mine working in the corner building. I had not seen him for 6 years now and I thought this would be a surprise. I parked the car the got to the 8th floor of the building, and I couldn’t see the company name anywhere. I asked the security guards and they said the company closed down a year ago. What a bummer! I was surprised. After a lot of struggle I was able to find his old residence number, but when I called it was not in use. I decided not to give up and I called the enquiry service and they said they had 50 people with the same last and first name. I have not given up yet, I am thinking of other ways to find him.

While I was not able to reach this friend, I wanted to talk to a friend of mine in Tirunelveli. He took me around to visit Nava Tirupathi temples there and it was a while since I got in touch with him. I had misplaced his number and I was looking from the morning to find his number and give him a call. To my surprise he sent me an email saying that he had visited some Vishnu temples nearby and thought of me. Well, what a telepathy! I was thinking of him and he was thinking of me.

My Philosophy take on this: We meet to reconcile karmas, the moment account balance reaches zero we go our ways and never meet.

From NY Times - It is all coming back again

Wedding Meet

I had met all my cousins during the wedding last week. We all grew up together, but now we are all far apart, some of them are geographically far apart, while some of us who live in the city just meet only in family functions. None of us in this world would like to sacrifice our relations and friends. When calamity occurs we all need shoulders to rest, hand to wipe the tears. We feel they are the most priced possession and so should we not go a long way to save them.


During the cousins meet last week, we were bantering but then suddenly we delved deeper in a serious conversation. How many of you can draw your family tree both sides, maternal and paternal? When was the last time you met your first cousin? When was the last time you met the cousin who lives in the same city? Well when we started to asking such questions, we all became uncomfortable and tensed. We decided to ask ourselves the question.

Why do relationships fade after sometime or after a generation?

Well this is a good question and people have asked the same before and they have tried to pull people together and keep relationship going, but only a few of them remain intact.

We live in a very dynamic world today and there is change happening at the blink of the eye. Our lives are filled with changes and movement. Most of the younger generation has moved out of the city to either the Silicon valley in India or in US in search of job. Migration has left the nest and our lives empty. Grandparents see their kids on webcams, but the ache in the heart can never be wiped out. Ask those people who make in “$”, what is that they miss in life? With hands in their heart and tears rolling down their cheek their reply would be their family and relatives. Money can’t buy certain things in life.

Villages that once used to be family hangouts are deserted. Old houses and lands that carried history and memories have been sold long back by baby boomers. This happened in the past 20-30 years. Sons have settled in US or elsewhere and baby boomers want to move closer to their families and have pushed them to sell everything and move on with life. They visit their native place once a year or when the astrologer says they have to visit their family deity. It is sad that grandparents have to narrate bed time stories about their halcyon days and about the traditional lifestyle and their village life. Tradition, culture and history is re-written in the city, but nothing can replace the original.

People have moved on and relations are all scattered everywhere. Mother’s brother lives in Delhi and father’s brothers live in Pune. We get to see our cousins once in 3 years. If they are in high school forget it, they must be working hard 24/7 fulfilling their parents dream to get into IIT. All cousins making the usual trips to the native village during summer holidays has stopped and there is no opportunity for the next generation to come together. We have lost touch with our roots.

Gone are those days when fathers had 3 brothers and 2 sisters, while mothers had a bigger family. For every function or occasion imagine the crowd that comes from the maternal and paternal side. With single or just 2 kids today, we seldom get time to call them and enquire the well-being of just the 1 sibling. Living a joint family gave kids an opportunity to learn the art of tolerance, give and take. With fissioning nuclear families tolerance, forgiveness, and feeling of togetherness has taken hit.

Weddings in those days used to be a 4 day affair and people travel for that occasion to meet up with relatives and catch-up with the loved ones. Cousins would be there a week before the wedding to take care of the arrangements. Today’s weddings are just a one day affair and some of them happening in New York and San Francisco only the parents of the bride and the groom get to go for the wedding. We’ve again lost touch with our roots. The cousins’ gang that used to throng our house a week before the wedding is all gone. Where are they? We don’t know.

We’ve all mastered the art of learning and earning, but we’ve lost to understand the value of relations and the essence of life. We don’t have time to make a trip to our native village anymore. There is so much of peace and prosperity welcoming us, but we are living a cramped life mentally and physically in the city.

Well all this is on one side, some families carry feud to the next generation. Jealousy, gripes, hard feelings with their cousins don’t fail to reach the next generation and hence value of relations gets diluted. Forgiveness and tolerance can only be found in the dictionary.

Leave alone cousins fighting over a piece of property, today sons and daughters born for the same mother and father fight over property and money and sacrifice relationship for money. Capitalism and greed for wealth has come down to the individual. I have seen people not attend the funeral of their father because he had partitioned a little more for his brother.

What is the cumulative result?
· We’ve drifted apart mentally, physically and emotionally
· Values and traditions have been replaced with money
· Tolerance and forgiveness can only be found in a dictionary
· Unity and togetherness is absent
· Roots are withering
· We run into our cousins without actually knowing them
· We live a shallow life with a narrow mind – cancerous life

We are here in dire straits looking at each other and pondering over this question. Well life is ours and we need to make it happy. If you decide money is happiness then you are headed for a serious collision, but if you prefer relations and friends over money then you will get to live this life happily. You know how to keep this link growing and the roots alive.

Let us wake up Yuppies to leave something for the next generation.

Monday musings...

This was the first time since I ventured to the seashore in the morning after Tsunami. The city was still half asleep from partying hard on Sunday night and a few autos were plying at terrific speeds and water lorrys making their daily trips at 4.30 am. The beach was a little crowded, there were a lot of people sleeping on the beach. Well, we are not scared of Tsunami is what they say. It was quite, the air was warm and listless, waves were kind of dull and may be tired from the weekend dance. A few crows were cawing on the beach and Koels were singing their melody touching all notes with its shrill high pitched voice. Fishermen were getting their catamaran ready for the days work.

I cleaned the sand, spread the sheet and faced the direction of the rising sun. I took a deep breath and started my yoga asanas. No jubilation from the waves, the ambience was quite, except for a few student and NCC cadets running on the shore. It took a solid 30 mins for me to complete the asanas and then get into pranayama. It was a little over 5.30 and the sun was getting ready to spread it rays and wake up the sleeping world below it. The sound of the waves hitting the shore was reverberating inside me and occasionally a few crabs got on my sheet and was supervising me mediating. The was mist covering the water and I could not see the horizon. Water and the horizon merged together and boats far away waiting to be berthed in the harbor.

I opened my eyes partially and looked at the scary crab, and he looked at me cheating and then hurriedly rushed back to his hideout. Peace and tranquility embalmed the atmosphere, while the clouds blanketed the sun so well that at 6.30 he was still lazing in his under the blanket. It was quite an experience to wake up on the shore, watch Sun come back to life. It is a little over 7.00 am when I took the ride back home. The beach was crowded then, the morning walkers pacing hurriedly on the sidewalks, NCC cadets running on the shore, martial arts classes happening on the shore.

Fizzy Fridays

We enjoy savoring different flavors in life. Every day is new, different and has it own surprises that unfold at untimely hour. The news about the promotion is sweet, while 0% raise is not orgasmic. Completing an arduous task is an achievement, while starting a new one can be a challenge and the road ahead can be bumpy. Well this is my 3rd job in my 7 years career. My first one was really interesting, I was young then and I was always on my toes looking for excitement and adrenalin rush. With lot of hopes on the salary and title the ego graph headed northwards, but soon after Sept 11, I was laid off and I became more prudent and don’t to earth. Anything can happen at any hour and one has to financially engineer his/her life. My second job started abysmally low wrt pay and position. There was no correlation between my education, salary and title. I rolled up my sleeves when people hesitated to hire and settled in for the lowest carrot on the stick. I have slowly moved up over the years after having worked for demanding boss, understanding boss and the skunk. The bottom line is to keep your boss’s ego on the pedestal and play servile.

Job is not everything in life and but still we need “Sugar” to make our life and people with us happy. After the 7 year mill with bouts of adrenalin rush, anxiety, hope, optimism, and sweat I have decided to take it easy. Work of course it is not the end or the beginning of life and for me it is 9am – 6 pm hobby.

Well 12.30-1.30pm is the best time of the day. Our canteen smells of good, healthy food with melodies from the 70’s playing the background. Lilting melodies of Raja (Paruvamey puthiya paadal, Janaki Manthiram, Andhi Mazhai) over the FM makes this the happiest hour of the day. The caterer comes with innovative recepies and snazzy names to market them. Last week I happen to catch fruit mix concoction in the canteen. Pieces of healthy fruits suspended in tangy juice combo and pineapple leaves were used to garnish the juice. Doesn’t it sound appetizing? Looking at the juice I was hoping to find a canopy and turn the canteen in the terrace into Bahamas. Do you feel like working in India?

I carry lunch from mom’s kitchen, usually packed with veggies and protein, absolutely no rice and chapattis. Today is my great grandma’s ceremony at home and hence lunch gets served only after the ceremony which ends at 1pm. I ordered Caluiflower, Peas Gravy (Gobi-mutter) along with 3 soft, gheeless fulkas (tortillas) and butter lime to wash it down. I was contemplating on Pomegranate juice but Butter lime sounded a great thirst quencher for the dog days. I am chasing my previous employer for Form 16, I will have to file my tax returns by the end of this month. I entered the investments made into the tax calculator and I found out that I had more room for tax benefits. I called up the ICICI folks and ask them to send a brochure on their tax savings bonds, and life insurance policies. I am hoping to double my investments this year.

It was a tangy day with butter lime lingers and enthralling melodies of Raja.

Hey before I end this blog, I happen read an article on Forbes which claimed India to be the hottest investment destination. A few of the numbers and statistics was rattling my brain (if any!! J ) rest of the computation is left to your imagination, but remember India is your destination.

60% of Indian population is below the age of 32
Emerging middle class in India is 300M
20M students graduate from colleges each year
Average household savings has dropped from 30% in 1999 to 18% in 2004

Back after a week

I was a busy with my cousin sister’s wedding preparations and had very little time to update my blog. Friday and Saturday was running around the city and looking through the check-list to ensure everything is fine.

Parry’s corner and the surrounding areas are still the same, narrow 10 feet wide streets, only rickshaws and cycles can make their way through the street. Fruit market, flower bazaar, Godown street is where the wholesale shops are situated. Wish we had a Sam’s or a Costco here in Chennai.

A never ending to do list, managing the event without any delays, attending to 1000 odd guest in the evening of reception. We have energy to move things to the wedding hall, but when it comes to packing and vacating the wedding hall, there is very little energy left.

I was down with flu and sinus. ooh… aah… ouch.. body pain kept each of my joints tight. I will need to sleep for the next two days to recuperate from the tiredness.

Chennai had a brief shower yesterday evening, thanks to rain god. The swooning heat disappeared yesterday afternoon and the sun was blanketed by grey moisture laden clouds, but it was still warm and muggy. The rain cooled the soil and brought down the temperature by a few degrees. Sun was out early this morning without any hesitation.

Everything around us keeps changing and we live in a dynamic world today. What was fashion in 70’s is again in today and lot of things that were in a few years ago had retired. Everything is a cycle, what goes around comes around. Never had thought radio would make a come back after computers and TV’s, CD’s and DVD’s, Game console raided our homes a few years ago. But FM radio in Chennai is sizzling hot. Autos in the city are equipped with radio sets and you could tune into your favorite stations and listen to the crazy jockeys, sms your answers to the puzzle. It is really interesting to tune into the FM stations and rock your way to work in the mornings.